Experienced Life Coach, Public Speaker, Creative Writer, advices the Male gender on what Masculinity is, and what is not, in Celebration of the international men’s day. Appreciating every man modelling the right thing to young boys.
“Masculinity isn’t about disrespecting women yet expecting to be respected. Masculinity is not feeling like respect is your birth right because you have a penis. Respect women as much as you want to be respected.
Masculinity is not about being proud of your wanton escapades with different women, but also shaming them. Masculinity isn’t about holding women to a higher moral standard. You should be as virtuous and morally upright as you expect women to be.
Masculinity isn’t about keeping shut when your fellow boys/men do evil things to women. Masculinity should be about speak up against evil, trashing the bro code and not letting misogynistic men be comfortable around you.
Masculinity is not measured by how much you can put a woman down. It’s not a competition between you and women. A woman is capable of excellence and you should accommodate her excellence; it doesn’t make you small or less.
Stop repressing feelings in the name of masculinity. It is toxic. It’s okay to seek help, it’s okay to cry, it’s okay to need hugs and reassurance. Masculinity is not all about strength. It’s okay to be weak on some days because you’re human.
Masculinity should not be about taking advantage of vulnerable and impressionable girls. Masculinity shouldn’t be synonymous with predatory behavior. If she’s drunk; clean her up, help her, not rape her.
Masculinity shouldn’t have anything to do with not respecting and understanding the concept of consent. If a woman says NO, that is enough. Masculinity shouldn’t be about force, violation and disrespect of a woman’s choice.
Masculinity should have nothing to do blaming victims of gender based violence. If a woman is raped, it’s not her fault, no matter what she wore, no matter what she drank, no matter where she went. Men should do better by respecting CONSENT. Clothes and being drunk aren’t consent
Masculinity should have nothing to do with being domestically useless. Cooking is a basic human survival skill, cleaning and washing are same. Teach your boys how to do these things.
Masculinity should never be about irresponsibility, blatant disregard for your relationship, infidelity and unaccountability. It’s possible to be a man and be faithful, accountable and loyal, as it should be.
Lastly, masculinity should be nothing less than humanity: having compassion, human decency, healthy esteem, being in touch with your emotions. Your masculinity should not be the threat to others. I appreciate every good man modelling the right thing to young boys. We’d do better❤️”